Have you ever thought about the subject of persuasion? If not, do you sometimes wonder why you say NO to one message and YES to another? Even more interesting. Why would someone say NO to a product offered by one source and YES to the same product offered by another source?

As someone who has an unquenchable passion for result-driven communication, I have always thought and researched on how to get people to say yes to me or the message I deliver. This ability is deeply rooted in the subject of persuasion. My keen interest in this subject took me to different sources. From the classic; How to Win Friends and Influence People, to Getting to Yes, to Age of Propaganda, and countless scholarly articles. Of all the powerful resources on this unique subject, one seems to stand out; Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, by Robert B. Cialdini.

It is difficult to talk or write on persuasion without mentioning Cialdini’s book, Influence. Originally published in 1984, the book goes deeper into this powerful subject. Why most of the other resources talk about the “what’ and “how” of persuasion, influence addresses the “why.”  He discussed six (6) fundamental principles of persuasion.

In the following paragraphs, I am going to highlight and help you understand these principles with examples and personal experiences.

Reciprocity

Have you ever felt the pressing need to give just as a return to a gift you received? I once ordered a lemonade at a restaurant. The order did not come with a free refill. Just as I was done with the glass, the waiter who so far has been so nice, walked up to my table with another full glass of lemonade and said “Sir, I love the way your smile brightens this room. You can have this”. He gave me a fresh glass of lemonade at no cost.  At the end of my dinner with my wife, I felt trapped. I felt a strong obligation to drop a tip that is beyond my normal boundary. Because of the human tendency to return a favor, which in this case was respect, quality service, and a free drink, I felt that need to go a notch higher with my tip.

There is something to take note of when it comes to reciprocity. The returned favor is most times larger than the gift.

For example, you were given a cup of coffee at the reception of a store, and then you spent over $100 for a product that cost $80. You got a free sample, and now you are sentimentally attached to the brand. I got a free $2 cup of lemonade, and I gave a $7 tip. Even the bible confirms it. “Give, and it shall be given unto you,” it doesn’t stop there, “good measure, press down and shaking together.” It simply means you get more than you give.   

Scarcity

This principle is the reason why a lot of people have items in their houses they don’t use. I will never forget when my wife came into the house and rushed to her laptop to buy a dress. The dress was on sale for 50% off, and the sale was going to end that day. I remember telling her, “Sales never end.”

When we believe that something is in short supply, our desire to get it increases. Do you remember when you saw the ad that said, “only five spots left”? Or when they said that item would go out of supply? Perhaps when you read the sign “70% off. Ends today.” How did you feel? I guess there was some adrenaline rush and, as such, didn’t want to be left out. You felt the desire to register for a seat, or to buy a copy.

Authority

Have you ever picked up a book by an unknown author and didn’t feel the need to buy or read it? But just as you were about and to drop it, you saw the endorsement by a popular figure, someone you respect. What happens next? You bought that book. Why? You think to yourself, if this highly respected figure can endorse it, then the book must be of great value. The principle of authority engineered your emotional purchase.

The principle of authority suggests that people follow the leading of authority or an expert in a field. You see this a lot in commercials, actors posing as doctors, wearing white lab coats, recommending a drug.

The good thing about authority is that, even if you don’t have anything to show that you have authority in a field or an area, you can get someone with authority to mention you.

Consistency

The principle of consistency states that people like to be consistent with the things they have previously said or done. You can argue with me, but I believe the strength of fandom or the difficulty to “un-fan” yourself from a club, an idea, or an institution, is rooted in the principle of consistency. Once you associate yourself, especially publicly, you feel the need to stay true to your words. You want to hold onto what you have committed yourself.

The business startup wants you to sign up for a newsletter. The nonprofits ask you to make a little $1 donation. The pastor asks you to say a prayer of salvation publicly. Taking these little first steps can put you on a long-term commitment.

Liking

I was having a conversation with someone at a networking event. It was a regular conversation, and my feeling for him was indifferent until he mentioned that he was an alumnus of my University. Not only was he an alumnus, but he also graduated the same year as me. Immediately he mentioned these; my attitude and feelings towards him transform instantly. I became vulnerable at that point. This is what the principle of liking is all about. People prefer to say yes to people they like.

This makes us ask the question. What causes one person to like another? This principle tells us that there are three factors. One, we like people who are like us. Two, we like people who compliment us. Three, we like people who cooperate with us around a common goal.

Consensus/Social proof

Would you buy a product online that doesn’t have any reviews? I guess not. A salesman ends his presentation by asking the audience to buy. You didn’t feel the need to comply until eight people bought the product in quick succession. Your skepticism for a product without reviews and your desire to buy a product because other people are buying has its roots in the principle of social proof. This principle states that “Especially when they are uncertain, people will look to the actions and behaviors of others to determine their own.” Businesses use this principle to persuade customers to make a purchase. Some businesses go to the extent of giving out products for free to get reviews.

These are the six principles of persuasion by Robert Cialdini. I believe you would be able to recognize them when you see them or when you are under the influence of them.

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