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How to Get Someone to Tell You the Truth

By: Solomon Asine

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It’s easy to get someone to tell you the truth. Here are some of the psychological tricks that you can adopt to get that person to confess.

There are different ways in which you can successfully get someone to confess the truth to you.

When trying to find out the truth from someone, there are two possible methods:

  • Coercive method
  • Psychological method

Just like me, I want to assume you have no interest in adopting the coercive method.

Instead, you can adopt some fundamental psychological tricks to get a liar to voluntarily tell you the truth without having any fear or feeling pressured.

With that in mind, here is how to get someone to confess the truth.

1. Meet in private

The first step to getting someone to confess the truth is to set a safe and secure environment for the conversation.

Avoid having such a conversation in the presence of any other person, even if it’s just one person, even if it is a familiar face.

When you discuss the issue in public, it puts pressure on the other party, and they are most likely to feel a sense of insecurity. This makes it less likely for them to divulge any sensitive information or admit wrongdoing.

According to an article on Psychologies.co.uk, to get someone to tell you the truth, you need to have a private meeting with them. According to the article, “Nobody confesses to a crowd.”

Arrange for a private meeting with the other person and ensure there is no one else present.

A private discussion shows the other person that you respect their privacy and integrity, which increases the chances that they will open up to you.

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2. Relax their fear

Now that you have arranged a one-to-one meeting, you should take a step further by allaying the fears or insecurity that the other person may have about the situation.

Assure them of your trust and confidentiality. Telling them that they definitely won’t get into any trouble as a result of whatever they disclose to you.

To get someone to confide in you, there is a need to remove the fear that they might have.

For example, where someone steals a car, the fear of landing himself in jail may make them decide against telling anyone the truth about the theft.

Now, as a good communicator, you need to let them know that their secret is safe with you and that they will not get in trouble when they confess to you.

Say something like;

“I know you fear I might report you to the police should you decide to tell me the truth about the missing car, but I have no plan of doing that. I just want to hear your side of the story so that we can fix the situation.”

So, to gain their trust and make them feel secure telling you the truth, offer them emotional, physical, and psychological protection.

3. Tell a worse version of the story

This mind trick works pretty well when trying to get the other person to confess the truth.

Try telling a worse version of the story by deliberately including wrong information in the account and see if they would try to correct you.

An article by Vanessa Van Edwards at Science of People reports that people cannot help but correct any false information about themselves.

However, where they fail to correct you, this could indicate that they didn’t commit the offense.

4. Get them to retell the story

Getting them to retell the story is a good way to tell if someone is lying since most liars are rehearse their lines or stories.

So, by asking them to tell the story differently, you disrupt their cognitive flow, rendering them almost incapable of retelling the story in the manner they desire without leaving out relevant facts or adding new ones.

There is, therefore, a need to adopt the “reverse order narrative,” which is the method of telling a story in reverse order.

Senior scientist Drew Lein stated that when you ask a lair to tell a story in a forward chronological order and then in reverse chronological order, they are likely to retell the facts differently.

Former Green Beret Sergeant Major (Retired) Karl Erickson also stated that you should start with a three-pointer when trying to find out the truth.

This means asking the same question in three different ways.

The goal is to look out for carefully repeated phrases that show that their answer has been rehearsed.

5. Avoid yes or no questions

By asking an open-ended question, you can get them to share their thoughts in detail.

Avoid asking close-ended questions that naturally attract a simple yes or no answer, as this gives the other person the opportunity to restrict their thought and tell a lie.

Instead, ask questions that not only engage them but also requires them to use more words.

Questions that get them to tell a story are great for this purpose.

Conclusion

Getting someone to tell you the truth is not as complicated as you think.

You only need good interpersonal communication skills to connect with the person, gain their trust, and finally, get them to tell you the truth without coercion.

So, if you feel you need help developing your social intelligence and interpersonal communication skills, contact us at Home of Influence today.

July 31, 2024 2:00 PM | Online

July 31, 2024 2:00 PM | Online

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